this is my life

I have been watching jungle gold and gold rush the past 2 nights, and it makes me feel incredibly stressed... yet I can't look away. What does this mean?

A couple of my kids found out I went on a date this week...oh boy! (apparently some of them have bat like hearing...I swear I was whispering to my team). 1st comment though was "Miss Ward! I knew you weren't going to die alone!" Naturally, I thought of this song. Thanks kiddo....you are the best!

Sometimes I have dreams that are so on the border of reality, I have to take a few minutes in the morning and decipher wether it actually happened or not. And usually, it is something dumb like being asleep in my dream and people coming in my room...so I try to wake up enough to brush my teeth.... my brain is so weird.

I significantly lowered the number of shows in my Hulu queue while off track the past few weeks. I am not even going to tell you how significantly...

Which reminds me: #February17thIsOctober19th best news ever!

Remember how I moved to Midvale in January? Up 3 flights of stairs? I have to move down those 3 flights of stairs soon. Yup...moving again. But only 7 blocks away. Awesome.

I have a love hate relationship with the heater. Mostly HATE. I would much rather have it be cold and cuddle up in my Aggie sweats, slippers, and blankets, than turn the heater on. Most people don't agree with me.

Which also reminds me... I just REALLY need to make it to an Aggie basketball game soon. I have lot's of screaming to do... Who's with me?

Fact: I kind of dislike the thought of the twins being 16 and going on dates. It makes me feel old and weird. Yes, I said it.

My coworker and I are applying to present at the UCET conference in March. #soexcited #ultimatenerdalert. Someone should just buy me suspenders and a pocket protector already....

I literally had to talk myself out of putting up my Christmas happiness tonight. I LOVE Thanksgiving....but I just am so excited to decorate! I blame my mother.

Have a ever mentioned how great my job is? I work with some crazy kids, and some crazy adults, and I love it.

Now I leave you with some of my latest faves:

this song has been playing nonstop for several months

same with this song + the rest of the album, and this song + the rest of the album. Just can't get enough.

I admit.... I wasted a lot of time on this site a bit ago..... and just now.

Watch this.... I bawled my eyes out

Source: lumea.tumblr.com via Whitney on Pinterest

"Be vulnerable. Brene would want you to..."

Here is a fun fact:
I live for a good TED talk. (if you don't know TED...stop what you are doing and spend a couple hours watching the amazingness that the site has to offer)

I mean TED itself stands for technology, education, and design, which are by far 3 of my top 5 most favorite interests. So clearly, this site is just for me.

I love brilliant ideas, creativity, and witnessing amazing people at work, which is what TED is all about.

A few weeks ago, I was having a heart to heart talk with a good friend. We were discussing daily irritations, confusions, joys, and just the meaning of life and love in general. (pretty serious business, right?) Well during this chat (which I swear to you, was not entirely about dating, contrary to what you might be thinking) she asked me if I had seen this particular TED video. Brene Brown: The Power of Vulnerability. She told me how she breaks down vulnerability and how important it is in our daily lives.  I went home that night, and immediately looked it up.

Let me tell you. This talk is amazing, and precisly what I needed to hear. I watched it twice right then, it was just that good. She talks about connection, shame, and fear, but wraps it up in a hilarious and very relatable speech. Seriously, take 26 minutes right now to watch this video... you won't regret it.

I have since watched it 3 more times. And am referencing her in regular conversation (yes, the title of this post was something that really came out of my mouth....followed by much laughter of course) 

Here are some of my favorite quotes

• If you cannot measure it, it does not exist
• “Vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage.”
• “That's what life is about: about daring greatly, about being in the arena.”
• Lean into the discomfort
• “You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.”
• "The people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, BELIEVE they are worthy of love and belonging."
• "I have a slight office supply addiction, but that's another talk"
• "I lost the fight, but probably won my whole life back"
• "Courage; it means to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart"
• Wholehearted people have:
• the courage to be imperfect, 
• the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others, 
• connection as a result of authenticity 
• the willingness to let go of who they think they should be in order to be who they are.
• fully embraced vulnerability and believe what makes them vulnerable, makes them beautiful
• "You can not selectively numb vulnerability. When we numb the bad things, we also numb everything... joy, gratitude, happiness, and then we are miserable."

Oh there are just so many great things about this talk. I can't wait to get my hands on her book and dive in even more. "Vulnerability is not weakness...." what a lesson! There are so many aspects of my life that I can and need to apply this to. It is about taking matters into my own hands, being truly happy with my life and making opportunities and experiences happen for myself. I love to create things, I love when things change for the better, but so often do I find myself not crossing that line of comfort, afraid of what people might say, or think. Afraid I might get hurt or let down. Afraid it won't work out, or feeling inadequate, weak and even unworthy of, or not good enough for a particular joy. "Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change." Clearly, everything she says are words to live by. So be vulnerable peeps, Brene would want you to...

images taken from TEDtalks-Brene Brown: The Power of Vulnerability

MoTab seats without the red snuggies...

How do you sum up an experience so incredible in one blog post? I'm not really sure. But this is an attempt nonetheless.

Let's just say I have this thing with amphitheaters and performance venues. It's the choir nerd in me, but acoustically speaking, some places are just better to sing in than others. For example, the shower is always a good choice. My laundry room is not...believe me, I have tried.

Well, let's rewind to back when I was in 6th grade, and the first session of conference was being held in the new conference center that April, I told myself I was going to sing there some day. Now, of course this initial dream came from the kid version of myself thinking that it would be when I am 60 and in MoTab with my super awesome husband of some sort. Thank heavens I didn't have to wait for THAT to happen.... it only took 12 years, but I finally made it to those cush-y, perfect posture, burgandy seats. This place is incredible. This was not my first time inside the conference center of course, but every time I step foot in this place, something else literally stuns me.

We could talk about how this place is over 1.4 million square feet, or how it is the largest auditorium IN the world. (#iknowweirdfacts) We could talk about how it seats over 21,000 people, and every time I have been to an event here, there are not many an empty chair in sight. We could talk about how the organ ranges 9 1/2 octaves, and the pipes alone range from a couple inches in height, to over 32 feet. We could talk about the gorgeous pulpit coming from Hinckley's black walnut tree, and how my heart aches a little bit whenever I see it.

I could keep going...but instead I will just have you know, that this was way more than just something to cross off my bucketlist. It was way more than just singing in a choir, and it was way more than a Relief Society broadcast.

I spent basically the whole month of September rehearsing for this, and each and every single rehearsal was been overwhelming, rejuvenating, and so rewarding. It sounds so cheesy, and I apologize since I normally don't get too preachy on this here blog of mine, but I have to document this somewhere, and this place just kind of works....

I had been hoping and wishing and praying for something to happen lately. I don't know what exactly I was wanting, I just knew I needed to be inspired somehow... and then this opportunity was literally handed to me.

It's funny how things work out, you know?

Let's just say it was perfect and I am a changed person. Highlights include, but are not limited to the following:

• Our director...I basically worship the ground she walks on now. A junior high choir teacher from Bountiful, and my new favorite person for real. So funny, and so inspiring. I asked her if I could be in every choir she directs....
• Having this be a 3 stake dealio meant I got to see old friends from my Holladay days, friends from college, and even make new friends. Who knew spending time with over 300 women could ACTUALLY be fun?
• Singing. Performing. Working my vocal chords. Ohhhhh how I miss the days where this was a constant occurance. Man, it felt good to be back at it again.
• Getting to sit in the MoTab seats WITHOUT wearing the red snuggies.
• Buying a new skirt. Hey, it's the little things too....
• Diving into the words of familiar primary songs, and making them come alive again. I never thought I could be emotional while singing "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus" but boy was I surprised when the waterworks started up, especially during the end ...'have faith, have hope, live like His son...'
• Singing my favorite hymn of all time "I Need Thee Every Hour," and trying to 'cry pretty' while doing it.
• learning that you can fight a sneeze by saying the word purple, and if you have an itch, just squish your toes together in your shoe. It works. I'm sold. 
• did I mention that organ? How about the digital button that plays 'Les Cloches de Hinckley.' That gave me chills 
• All the 'Sister Wives' jokes.... sick. Yet funny. But not... I still would like to know who decided on white button down blouses and black skirts for a group of women...
• Finally seeing the teleprompter....Don't ask me why, but this was a REALLY exciting moment for me.
• Sister Burton and I are pretty tight, (serious, we have inside jokes and everything)... so it felt kind of stellar to be there for her first broadcast
• FINALLY GETTING TO SING IN THE MOTAB SEATS!? Seriously people. Dream. Come. True. 
• Being within feet of the prophet
• Feeling the immediate sense of peace. Everything that was said that night was tailor made for me. Seriously. 
• Adding this to my future MoTab resume....just kidding...kind of?
• Getting the thumbs up at the end from Elder Uchtdorf. 

Obviously, September was a good month. That it was. 

Check out the main events:

Midvale YSA 

Paris is always a good idea...

My heart skipped a beat...
anyone want to go, right now?

seriously, I am not joking right now.
I'm reaching desperation!
I'm sick of waiting!

ugh. Being poor and a grown up is hard.
Excuse my while I go watch my favorite movie now....

wise words

this guy. 

ya, this guy,

always knows what to say...

definitely having a jason night. 

like always.....

one of those days

preach Zooey. preach.

LOVE her.

LOVE this show.

that is all for now.

oh wait, except for this song.

so fun.

ok i lied, here are two more.

can not WAIT for these 2 concerts. YES!

and yes I just barely realized that sara bareilles is in both....go her!

and don't worry. 

more summer songs and happiness,
 coming your way!

many posts are in progress...go me!

Beethoven's 5 Secrets

this give me chills. Probably because... 

A. It's the cello, and I downright believe that the cello is the most angelic sound on the planet

B. Beethoven's 5th is my absolute favorite classical piece. ever. serious. 

C. I love love love a clever mashup

D. I just think The Piano Guys are downright stellar

Description taken from their youtube page-

Story behind the song:
The Lyceum Philharmonic (Youth Orchestra) and its director, Kayson Brown, approached us with this idea. We loved it. It combined two of the things we are working to accomplish -- inviting people to classical music and inspiring young musicians. Steven Sharp Nelson had soloed with the orchestra the previous year and loved the spirit and the talent that the orchestra showed at such young ages (ages 13-18!) Together we developed the concept of "Beethoven's 5 Secrets," combining OneRepublic's tune "Secrets" with melodies and moments from all four movements of Beethoven's 5th Symphony.

We used 5 different melodies from the 4 movements of Beethoven's 5th Symphony (not including the "bridge" the orchestra plays in the middle). Try to guess where they are and where they come from!

What are Beethoven's secrets? He had many. His most prominent secret that he desperately tried to keep from the public and that caused him to be considered extremely eccentric, irritable, and hermit-like was his "weakness." He was deaf during most of his life. Imagine that...one of the greatest composers that ever lived could hardly hear. And yet, he wrote his life's greatest works after becoming deaf. He believed that art itself had "secrets" that had to be "forced into" in order to obtain art's highest level. There is no doubt Beethoven discovered many of the "secrets" of art -- people all over the world enjoy them every day. He was a true master of music, blessed by God. This piece and video are dedicated to him.

Perform "Beethoven's 5 Secrets" and the entire Beethoven Symphony No. 5 with Steven Sharp Nelson at Lyceum Music Festival this year! Work up-close and personal with Steven and other amazing professional musicians like the concertmaster of the London Symphony and Rotterdam Orchestra. Advanced players ages 13-21 are invited to audition. Visit http://www.LyceumMusicFestival.com for details

how old is your soul?

this song/video is in fact the happiest thing of the year so far.

oh joy joy joy

my heart is happy :)

tis' the season

We all know how much I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE this time of year, but I am afraid it is slipping away from me faster than I can run through a pile of leaves! So I decided to make a list (which should come as no surprise, I have lists coming out of my ears...) of all my MUST-DO for autumn. And when that list is all checked off, then I will be able to welcome in the next happy season, complete with frozen fingers and slush soaked pants....(ewww, can you tell I am SO not ready for winter?)

1. Watch the following movies:

• Hocus Pocus, It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown, Practical Magic, What Lies Beneath, Birds, Watcher in the Woods, The Village, Young Frankenstein, and any other deliciously scary and/or halloween-y movies

2. Make my favorite Pumpkin Chocolate Chip cookies...they are heavenly and (weight watchers friendly) as well as any of the FANTABULOUS recipes that I have found on pinterest...mmmmmmmm
3. Find a pile of leaves to jump in to...or at least walk through and just enjoy that perfect smell.
4. Step on some extra crunchy leaves
5. Take pictures in the canyon
6. Go a Corn Maze and/or Haunted House
7. Go to a costume party
8. Carve a pumpkin WHILE watching It's a Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown
9. Make Grannies Chili...and maybe some cornbread
10. Go to a football game
11. Bake a Thanksgiving Pie
12. Stay in my PJs and read all day (with plenty of hot cocoa)
13. Finish of my autumn '11 playlist
14. Attempt to recreate some of the happiest of autumn crafts found via pinterest
15. Read the following happy fall books

• The Little Old Woman Who Wasn't Afraid of Anything by Linda Williams, Skippy Jon Jones In Mummy Trouble by Judi Schachner, The Stranger by Chris Van Allsburg, Witches Broom by Chris Van Allsburg, Room on the Broom by Julie Donaldson, By the Light of the Halloween Moon by Caroline Stutson

hello! I've just got to let you know...

First off, the fact that this is the 2nd post this month and it's only the 10th is pretty legit right? Well, I'm getting back so don't you even fret!

Second of all, its SEP week. AKA Conference week. AKA report card week. AKA meet with all the parents week. AKA might as well bring a sleeping back and my toothpaste to school week, cause I will be THERE wayyyyy more than I will be anywhere else. Needless to say its going to be exhausting, and long. But its all good. After this week we have 3 pretend days of school next week, and I go off track until 11.11.11....I love year round school :)

Third of all, I have been scrambling to get my report cards done, finished and printed, but one of the things I am realizing about my self, it that I kind of a little bit despise entering grades into the computer. So I leave it all to the end, which mean instead of a weeks worth of grades to enter...I had 9. Kill me. Luckily, I have that finished, but still had one project left to grade. Social studies. This project consisted of 12 maps...PER KID. Oh, 12 times 23...why YES!!!! I DID just finish grading 276 maps. Jealous right? *ooooowwww head hurts*

Well, amidst these 276 pages of maps, I had to have the 5 following things in order to maintain my sanity
1. Glee playing in the backgroud
2. a few Jason Mraz breaks
3. left over Cafe Rio (i love that i can get 3 meals out of their salads)
4. several facebook/youtube breaks.
5. roommates to come talk to me

and that is why I bring you this post...these are the best videos that surfaced from this Monday night adventure:

ahhh this kills me!

I have no clue why I laughed out loud at this one...but I really did

this is for my sister...she is obsessed with this group, and they sang a little JB. in your face Gretch! Just embrace the Bieber Fever like the rest of us!

I love him. duh.

 

and last but not least. I am OBSESSED with this song...can't even tell you how many times I have played it since it was released. Especially the strings that come in like 20 seconds in....oh. my. gosh.

okay. now to put in comments for all 23 students and then I can be done!!!!

sometimes life gives you lemons...

Beware of the killer lemons!

now don't get me wrong...i love lemons.

lemonade, lemon bars, lemon yellow wall color, lemon sorbet, lemon pepper...this weekend i even went to a new pizza place called 'pizzeria limone', which had a delectable margarita pizza and lemon brownies which were quite tasty, so believe me when i say im grateful for your average lemon...

but tonight im talking about those lemons in life that are really sour and sting your eyes and come flying at you when you least expect them. they are quite rude really, and always seem to be disguised as something else, or they just pop out of no where. they are painful and make us feel weak, lonely, and scared. ya, no one really likes those lemons. but for some reason we all get them.

i have had a few of those lemons lately. blast. not cool. not fun. and they REALLY sting. that deep down sting that seems down-right unbearable. luckily its only for a moment...its only ever for a moment, even though it seems like forever (they are tricky little things, those lemons). but i really am grateful for those lemons, and the knowledge i have that those lemons each have a purpose. and even though they sting really REALLY bad, and make you want to gouge your eyes out, say bad words, and run away (in that order) it eventually stops stinging, and makes us stronger. it gets better. it really does.

so here's to the lemons. here's to life, the beautiful thing it is. and here's to all of us making that lemonade...or lemonade bars, which ever tickles your fancy!

oh, and here's to one of the best songs ever...it really is a beautiful world.

"Reading good books ruins you for enjoying bad books."

"Wasn't that the point of the book? For women to realize, We are just two people. Not that much separates us. Not nearly as much as I'd thought."  

I finished The Help about 2 weeks ago, 

and am already aching to read it again.

i dont know why it took me so long to finish it, 

(probably because i was so busy at the end of the school year)

but i seriously loved it. 

such a clever read, with brilliant characters.

ahhh it was lovely.

i actually listened to the majority of it on audio, and it was

AMAZING.

im not usually a fan of audio books, but i think im newly converted!

can't wait to see the movie with kym and her mom next weekend! yippeeee!

"...out of the blue, he kissed me. Right in the middle of the Robert E. Lee Hotel Restaurant, he kissed me so slowly with an open mouth and every single thing in my body-my skin, my collarbone, the hollow backs of my knees, everything inside of me filled up with light."

'That's what I love about reading: one tiny thing will interest you in a book, and that tiny thing will lead you onto another book, and another bit there will lead you onto a third book. It's geometrically progressive--all with no end in sight, and for no other reason than sheer enjoyment.'(12)

 go read this book...NOW!!!!

its amazing.

i borrowed it from one of my team teachers, and i couldnt put it down!

as soon as payday comes again, im running to the store to buy it for myself, so i can read it again and again

and mark up all the FANTASTIC quotes and moments. seriously, it was wonderful and enchanting! 

ahhhh love a good book.

'It was amazing to me then, and still is, that so many people who wander into bookshops don't really know what they're after--they only want to look around and hope to see a book that will strike their fancy. And then, being bright enough not to trust the publisher's blurb, they will ask the book clerk the three questions: (1) What is it about? (2) Have you read it? (3) Was it any good?'(16)

oh life

oh bother, its been so long! so here are some random thoughts as of late...

can i just say im addicted to pinterest? okay good. im ADDICTED to pinterest. i signed up a long long time ago, but never logged on really until about 2 or 3 weeks ago. CANT. STOP. PINNING!!! there should be a support group.

i have had a few harry potter dreams lately, i still cant believe its all over. no more books. no more movies. what a cruel cruel world in which we live in

finally made it to lagoon a few weeks ago. it was lovely. but i felt super old. the heat about killed us, but we prevailed. we stayed 12 hours, and it took me like an entire week to recover. i think going in october is the best idea ever...wont wear us out so fast!

on july 23rd, i did something crazy! i camped out in downtown salt lake. it was weird for me....but apparently the whole state does it, cause there were people piled ever where. it was a strange experience, but it was such a FUN way to celebrate pioneer day. the parade was awesome, and they totally put boise parades to shame. sad.

birthdays are super weird. i mean really. so what if you go from 22 to 23, or 78 to 79 woopdeedoo. who cares? its like the quote from one of my favorite shows :

“I saw him on the news recently ‘celebrating’ his 100th birthday…They wheeled him out and he had that wide-eyed expression of pained confusion that God reserves for the very, very old on their birthdays. You know, the one that says ‘Who are you, who am I and why is this cake on fire?’”

(pretty sure only kym will know this one)

but seriously why is this cake on fire? why do we celebrate birthdays past the age of like 16? its silly to me. but regardless of that, i did have a good birthday. i did my laundry, spent hours trying to consolidate my student loans, organized my important documents, walked around gardener village with liz and had a lovely dinner with my TWO favorite katies! ms craigo and ms katie jane they were awesome and took me to red robin (yummm) and to a movie, which i will have you know is my NEW FAVORITE. oh my goodness...so magical. SO happy.

i also went home to boise for the weekend and let my family wish me a happy birthday, which was fun :) the best present of all was mr thornton...all for my very own. swoon!

while home we also had samuels eagle court of honor, which was lovely! got to see lots of friends and family, and even got together with some of my high school crew and performed. it was weird, and awesome.

for some reason, my dad told samuel that after he got his eagle he would take him to golden corral which is this giant buffet in boise (dont ask me why on earth he would ever WANT to go there, but he seriously couldnt wait...the kid loves food, whatever) so the day after the court of honor, dad and samuel go to golden corral...well, about 30 minutes after they leave i get a text from samuel (fyi he doesnt have a phone, just an itouch) this was our conversation

samuel: so im basically in heaven right now

me: oh geez. how come? non stop food and free wifi

samuel: oooooooooooooooo yyyyeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

me: oh wow. you need help

samuel: i can die now. i'll just go to scotland as a ghost with joseph smith or something

me: what? you are the weirdest kid i know!

samuel: am not im basically the coolest

me: okay maybe, but still

seriously, i have no idea where he came from.

so the week i saw midnight in paris, i also saw soul surfer and crazy stupid love. seriously loved them all. 2011 had the best summer for movies, thats for sure. i mean, i have already seen crazy, stupid, love 3 times now...i need help. but i just loved it so much. and who wouldnt want to stare at ryan gosling for another 2 hours? i mean, personally, i could stare at him forever...just sayin

is it sad that im really excited for school to start? i love my job, and am super excited about all the fun things i have planned. oh im such a nerd...i know i will be crying as soon as it starts, cause for some reason i feel the need to be super woman, and am now helping direct the school choir, as well as serve as a student council teacher. what is my problem? chances are you wont be seeing me much this year, or i wont be sleeping much...we shall see

how is it that with a college degree and a career, im more poor than i ever have been. being an adult kinda sorta really sucks

um...what else...OH nitrous oxide is super weird! gahhhh

okay im done for now!

peace. love. happiness

so long, farewell...

remember this one time, where i graduated from utah state in december, and on february 7th i started teaching 4th grade? sometimes it still baffles me...its crazy that something i worked so hard for, and something i wanted so badly has come true, and has been my entire life for the past 5 months. needless to say, im still ecstatic, overjoyed and i love my job. i had a super awesome class, and if i could i would post videos and pictures of our end of the year celebrations...but thats legally a no-no, so just imagine me and 23 ten year olds having a grand old time, and you will be set.
the last week was a crazy whirlwind. i had to get awards done, grades and reports cards done, had to clean my room, and pack up and move in to the off track closet, all while still teaching. luckily there was something awesome every day, monday we taught the kids how to make oragami frogs (a nice little angle and line review) and then we raced them in the gym. en-ter-tain-ing. tuesday we went on a field trip to the utah capitol, toured the daughters of the utah pioneer museum, and ate lunch and played at liberty park. seriously so much fun! wednesday was field day, and i got extra cool points for being the first teacher in the dunk tank...sweet. thursday we had our 4th grade rendezvous. played pioneer games, made leather necklaces, and made homemade rootbeer!
friday was the last day, and what a strange day it was. the kids were anxious, and i felt super anxious, like there was something dire that needed to be done. but we just had a lovely day, there was the faculty vs 6th grade softball game that morning, and it was a blast! im pretty sure we tied with the 6th graders, but we really just had a great time, and the kids loved cheering us on. we then had a class auction so the kids could spend the last of their class money. we had year book signing and then we cleaned up the room. the last half hour of school, we sat in a circle on the floor and the kids each shared their favorite part of the year, then i went around and told each of them what my favorite thing about them was, and why i was grateful to be their teacher...i felt myself getting emotional a few times, but then some kids would crack a joke, and that was forgotten. but when the bell rang, and i hugged each kid and wished them a happy summer, i felt it coming. once each kid was gone, i turned around and definitely burst into tears. i seriously felt so silly, but so sad! i mean, i will see most of them again, since they are only going to be in 5th grade right around the corner, but these were MY kids. my FIRST class. my FIRST year teaching! i learned so much about myself, and about teaching from them, and now i have to say goodbye? rude. i dont think its fair, but i guess thats part of teaching. hopefully i have a super awesome class next year...
next year which starts in 6 weeks...gotta love year round school! (i actually really do, i think its genius)
here's to my 6 weeks of summer vacation! PARTY!

I need a little bit of sunshine from you...

poor little blog has been neglected for several weeks. so badly in fact, that im now THINKING in blog post form just because i have been missing it so much! i really dont have much to say, but what else is new. its been a crazy few weeks with end of the year testing and all sorts of crazy things going on, so i have not really had the time to breath or eat normal meals, let alone blog. but here are random thoughts as of late. because as i know i have mentioned before, random thoughts are really the only the thoughts that matter...

i love my shatter nail polish. a lot. and cant wait to get more colors. ya thats right, i follow the crowd...

i also really love my car. i havent mentioned it on here yet, but my new car now has aggie license plates, and has officially been named pierre. i think he's cute.

i will admit though, while watching 27 dresses, and just friends, my lovely blue volvo named betty is momentarily missed.

the other day i realized that school ends in less than a month. and i literally got kind of emotional that i have to send my kids to the 5th grade. cant i just be their teacher forever?

since christmas, i have not been home for more that 24 hours. im REALLY looking forward to my boise adventure july 4th weekend. yay!

speaking of boise, i guess its just been an emotional week, because on monday i got kind of emotional that playcamp was starting that day, and i am definitely not there. man, i guess we cant have it all can we?

my new froomie katie is going to italy tomorrow. (rude i know) and we are currently watching letters to juliet and writing letters to juliet so she can take them with her. we were thinking of all writing the same one that says "dear juliet, im sick of waiting for romeo. will you please send the next best thing to holladay, utah? thanks friend!" think we will get an answer?

i have reached a definite level of creepy that only jesika and kym will understand. bah haahhahaha

i love matt white. like a lot. and i love that i met him and we 'talk' on facebook. he's just so great.

speaking of awesome male singers. i shouldnt be happy at someones breakup, but YES YES YES! his new album will TOTALLY benefit from this, and so will i...somehow...someday...have i ever mentioned how much i love him? well its like a lot.

i talked to my lovely cousin today for over and hour and it was so great! i love her.

kym and i are planning an awesome trip for january. i love teaching year round and being able to go on vacations while everyone else is in school

book club with the girls this summer...STOKED!

officially been to bob's TWICE so far, and there are MANY more trips to come! words can not describe the love i have for a snow cone. NO one gets it.

last saturday kym and i drove down to my favorite LOGAN TOWN! the weather was gorgeous, we went to lunch with karinne and 'little baby' and laid on the quad just chatting for a while. then we got snowcones at my favorite snowcone stop in front of hastings. ohhhhh its delicious. i just love everything about logan. boy do i miss it!

while in logan i bought aggie icecream for my kiddos and we are having a party tomorrow after our last test. they can hardly contain themselves, they are so excited! and...so am i!

i feel as if this is long enough, and probably was already long enough like 12 comments back, so not that anyone reads this, but i will cut my random string of thoughts a little short so as not to bore you any more. i promise i will be back soon! i have missed my dear little bloggy blog!

hope everyone is having a stupendous week! pray this beautiful weather holds up! tonight on my evening run, it actually SMELLED like summer. it was glorious!

peace. love. happiness. <3

mr firth and books. what else is there to love?

seriously. how true is this? ahhh i love it.
im sad at how much of my reading time has been diminished by work/teaching. and im really looking forward to finding a nice balance once things start calming down a little bit.
i just love to read, and i love escaping to a new place created by a magical book.
some friends and i have decided on doing a summer book club, which im really looking forward to.
i believe our first book is the help. which i am stoked to read.
oh the world of books.
what a magical place it is.

i love life.

"the doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live"

today was one of those reflective kind of days.

as mentioned in my last post, i have been in this weird funk, and honestly i haven't been able to pinpoint where it stemmed from, but the past two days i have been in this odd reflective mood. trying to in a sense awaken myself from this funk without completely ignoring it, but finding a way where i can move past it and learn something about myself. now, this makes me sound really weird, and its not like i have been all gloomy and depressed lately, just off...i dont really know how to explain it.

but everything about today helped. i woke up this morning to the pitter patter of rain, and was filled with joy. i love cracking my window, hearing the drizzle, and smelling the dirt and earth. then i watched this movie while getting ready for church. cute and a little cheesy, just how i like my movies, but with a really great message about our views on life, our personal relationship with God and the influence we can have on others. it made me happy. i seriously loved the movie. church was wonderful as well. nothing necessarily stood out to me today, but just being at church always puts me in a good mood, and rejuvenates me in every sense of the word. then the home teacher came over, and the roommates and i all kind of opened up a little more than usual and a lot of things were brought to light today. after wards, we talked, and laughed, and cried and then went on a drive. it was beautiful and rainy and exactly the escape i needed.

sometimes i think we all lose our focus, and it takes a slap in the face, or a stumble for to figure it out again. there are a lot of things i want to refocus on, and i love that all i needed was a rainy weekend and a tear jerking movie for me to realize it. i love life.

peace. love. happiness

Birds come down from sky so blue...

do not fear! i am alive, just have neglected my blog. i went on a fantabulous roadtrip, with 2 fantabulous girlfriends, and am currently working on that post. it was an epic adventure...so it takes time. until them:

1. have i mentioned that im obsessed with Toms? ya. now own 3 pairs...and its only a matter of time until i own more. judge away.

2. i love when fantastic things happen when you least expect it. for example i randomly went to provo a few weekends ago to visit my friend jennifer. we were going to eat at some mexican resturant, but ended up going to brick oven. well it was simply meant to be, because i most definitely ran into my dear friend Emily....it was happy. i heart her.

3. i think im borderline obsessed with this song

4. is it june yet? im dying for season 3 of Drop Dead Diva

5. speaking of which....the Drop Dead Diva soundtrack just may be the BEST purchase of my life. sooooo entertaining. pretty sure this show was made for me...yep. its definite.

6. did you watch 'beyond the blackboard' last night? can't wait to get it on dvd. love stacey. love the movie. love being a teacher. happy.

7. have i mentioned that i have to buy a new bookshelf, because i have a small dvd problem? so embarassing...and so fantastic

8. spiced orange harvest people. you have until WEDNESDAY folks!!!! VOTE VOTE VOTE

9. only in the LDS church would i have participated in an easter egg hunt at almost 23 years old, and hear during the opening prayer "as we search for easter eggs and feel of thy spirit" oh man gotta love it!

10. kasidy and i went to two different stores today in search of easter peeps. im quite depressed that i didnt get any at all this easter season. my favorite thing is stale peeps! sigh...

11. still off track, and currently without a car for the next week. sigh.....my apartment is going to be very clean and very well organized...just sayin

and a mini sneak peek of my fantastic adventure...

peace. love. happiness.

Because when you know something, its yours forever...

I honestly don't even know how to start this post, because I don't know how to effectively express something that means so much to me, without sounding ridiculous...but here it goes anyways.

I distinctly remember being in Miss Sanderson's 3rd grade class, and deciding that I wanted to be a teacher when I grew up. I wanted to be in school for the rest of my life, because I loved it that much. I loved learning and I wanted to teach others to love learning. I remember always playing school in Emily's garage, and demanding to be the teacher. I would give Emily and my little brother Ethan 'assignments' that they would need to complete before the next day. Well, as you can see, not a whole lots has changed. I had a dream, and I did it. I am a teacher now, and I couldn't be more happy. Yes there are struggles, yes the legislature is a bunch of crap, and nothing in the education system is fair, but I do what I love. I work with kids every day and I have the opportunity to make a difference, even if it be small and simple.

Well, last year during student teaching, I had the opportunity to work with 3 amazing women who will always hold a special place in my heart. Two cooperating teachers who taught me more than they will ever know, and one supervisor who guided me and helped me be the best I could be. My supervisor was Stacey Bess, and she is without a doubt a remarkable woman. The first time I met her, I was a scared little pre-teacher, intimidated by her teaching history and amazing-ness. At the age of 23, Stacey was assigned to teach at the 'school' at the homeless shelter in downtown Salt Lake. She was given no resources, no training, but just told to show up and hopefully keep the kids off the street. So what did she do? She changed lives. The experiences she had as a young teacher are remarkable and as she shared her story at our little pre student teaching orientation, I was moved to tears....well, more like sobs. Then I found out she was my supervisor, and I was scared to death. How could I ever impress a teacher that had impacted so many lives? How could I teach in front of her without being nervous? But then I met her face to face, and knew I could learn so much from her and was excited to begin the journey. She came in every other week to observe my teaching, and always gave me great advice and ideas to help improve. We had seminars with the other student teachers in the school, and we usually ended up just talking and laughing about who knows what.

During student teaching I read and re-read her book "Nobody Don't Love Nobody" 3 times, and am almost finished with it again. It is seriously an amazing story that makes me multiple times throughout the book. Well, Hallmark purchased the rights to her book and made it into a movie entitled "Beyond the Blackboard", and tonight I had the chance to see one of the first screenings of it in Logan. To say I cried throughout the entire movie would be a complete understatement. It was a beautiful movie, yes cheesy Hallmark-ish at times, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. The movie showcased how remarkable of a woman Stacey is, and what she did to help change the lives of these people. Watching the movie definitely gave me that reassuring feeling that I am in the right profession, that I am lucky to be a teacher, and lucky to have the opportunity to make a small difference.

Clearly, it was a wonderful experience. And to be able to talk to Stacey afterward was fabulous. The movie is going to be aired on CBS on Sunday, April 24th and I think everyone should watch it. Its cute, its funny, its happy, and its a touching story about an amazing teacher. What more could you ask for?